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Laraz Kaguya's FiNaL Stand(In a Rose Garden)

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Laraz Kaguya's FiNaL Stand(In a Rose Garden)

Post by Guest on Wed Dec 24, 2008 9:37 pm


After killing the Giant spider of flesh eating doom, Laraz vowed never to fight another thing that was Flesh Eating. Deciding it was time to go visit Awegakure to get some new threads, he headed that direction. On his way there he noticed a nice garden of roses. Thinking that Paks-chan would like Roses for her garden, he stopped to pick her some.

This was his most epic mistake. As soon as he picked a rose from the garden of roses, a little harmless bunny hopped out of the nearby forest and towards him. Laraz was awed by it's cuteness and went to pet it. THAT WAS BEFORE IT TURNED INTO A FLESH-EATING RABBIT FROM HELL! The rabbit latched onto Laraz's throat and started biting him, with the strength of ten billion body builders on steroids.

Once the bunny was finished with Laraz, he started crawling towards the Awegakure. This was however before a BAT-RANG come flying at him and hit him square between the eyes. " I thought I put you in a padded cell! " Batman yelled flying down, and started stomping on Laraz's poor defenceless head. Now some say this was just karma biting Laraz in the ass, but oh no.. It would get much worse.

After Batman left the scene, Laraz slowly started to get up. Hearing a revving noise he turned around and saw a man running straight at him with a weird thing in his hand. The man halted in his place and started screaming. " OMG IT'S A CLOWN KILL IT! " The man charged forward and proceeded to chainsaw Laraz's left arm off. This man was known as Marcus Fenix. Marcus, scared to death that he'd missed a vital spot, went running scared off screaming bloody murder.

Now if you think this is bizarre, then you've got another thing coming. The Rock-God himself from Guitar Hero, suddenly appeared before Laraz. Handing the one arm Laraz a Guitar Hero controller, he ordered him to play. But Laraz could not play, so the Rock God from Guitar Hero proceeded to open up a can of whoopass, litterally, and smashed the fake guitar over Laraz's head and then poofed from existance.

Laraz slowly awoke from his unconciousness after about ten minutes. As he was standing up, he was bashed over the head with a Gravity Hammer, by Master Cheif. " I HATE CLOWNS! " The Cheif said and took off running. Now normally when the Gravity Hammer hit you, you'd die.. But oh no Laraz wasn't lucky enough for that. The poor man was still alive and fully awake for the next part of this slow painful torture.

Next the poor man had to listen to eight hours of Hannah Montana live, because Satan Herself forced him to listen. Screaming her lyrics into his ears made him want to rip his eyes and ears out and then beat himself to death with a dead carabough. But his arms and legs were restrained by Hannah Montana's satanic powers. Even he, Laraz Kaguya, could not escape hell's most demonic witch alive, which is Hannah Monatana.


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Re: Laraz Kaguya's FiNaL Stand(In a Rose Garden)

Post by Guest on Wed Dec 24, 2008 10:00 pm

PART 2 Shorter than Part 1

Now for Laraz, not much could get worse... Or that's what he thought. Suddenly a guy dressed up in the nutcracker suit walked up to him. " Hey there fella! Do you know what time it is? I believe it's nutcrackin' time! " The nutcracker started jumping up and down right on Laraz's balls. This made Laraz wish he was dead, but forsome reason HE STILL WASN'T DEAD!

" God... Just kill me... Kill me now... Please! " Laraz begged, looking up into the heavens. That was before God appeared right beside him. " I would if I could... But I can't... Don't ask me why but I just can't.. But I will do this for you. " God then proceeded to pull the biggest hammer known to man out of thin air. It was called the Ban Hamma. " I will ban you from heaven because your not a very good christian.. I mean you killed like 300+ people... What's up with that man! " Slamming the Ban Hamma onto poor Laraz, only squished his body, and sent him into a world of pain, but didn't kill him.

Now if you think that was bad, wait till you hear this one. Peter Griffin, yes the same one from the show Family Guy, started walked over. " Ah Crap! I gotta take a number two.. " Now seeing nothing but a guy laying on the ground, Peter did the one thing he knew best. " POOP ON THE HOBO! " Peter ran over and took a steamy wet poop all over Laraz's feet. " Well there ya go Mr. Hobo.. Have a great day! "

Litterally crying for help, Laraz didn't see what was coming for him now. " I hate men that cry! " Superman yelled and started punching Laraz with superpunches. Next he ripped Laraz's heart out. " Yeah.. Eat that prick.. Stop crying you give men everywhere a bad name. " Taking a big bite out of the heart Superman then flew off. Now your probably wandering HOW THE HELL IS LARAZ STILL ALIVE!? Well I still don't have the answer to that so your just going to have to sit here and read some more of this random gibberish.


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Re: Laraz Kaguya's FiNaL Stand(In a Rose Garden)

Post by Guest on Wed Dec 24, 2008 10:26 pm


Now as Laraz slowly got back to his feet, he noticed a little old granny walking beside him. That was before even more disaster struck. Suddenly a sleigh fell and ran Laraz right over. Santa Clause stepped out of the Sledge and started yelling at Rudolf. " Oh my god! How could you miss the grandma! THE SONG DOESN'T GO RANDOM GUY GOT RAN OVER BY A REINDEER! IT GOES GRANDMA GOT RAN OVER BY A REINDEER! God your so bad at this! Last year you ran over a cat... This year a guy.. What's next.. a Pokemon!? "

Now for all of you that don't know him, Michael Phelps is part dolphin.. That's why he won in the Olympics. Why am I telling you this? Well because I can. Michael Phelps and a group of 200 Dolphins started running overtop of Laraz. Laraz started screaming. " GOD IF YOUR TOYING WITH ME.. AT LEAST MAKE IT MAKE SENSE! DOLPHINS AND MICHAEL PHELPS CAN'T SURVIVE ON LAND! IT'S A RULE IN THE DICTIONARY! "

Now if that didn't make you think I was insane, this will. Suddenly the Guitar Hero God comes back down from the sky and points at Laraz. Suddenly everything Laraz is wearing turns into Guitar Hero affiliated clothing, which doesn't sit well with the Rock Band Nerd Group of America(RBNGoA). They walked over to Laraz and started beating him with Random Rock Band 2 equiptment. This was however before the Guitar Hero Nerd Group of America Assosiation United With Guitar Homies of America(GHNGoAAUwGH) come over and started to have a Who Can Beat the Hobo up better contest.

Now this really pissed off the Master Cheif is the Best Video Game Ever Group of America Japan and Sony(MCitBVGEGoAJS), which hell let's face it makes no sense, since Master Cheif is made by Microsoft and isn't a video game. This caused those angry people of the MCitBVGEOGoAJS to attack the poor Laraz also, which made him want to die even more, because he was being beat up by nerds. At least if it was Jocks or something it would be cool, but no.. It was nerds.


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Re: Laraz Kaguya's FiNaL Stand(In a Rose Garden)

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